Damn foodstamp poker players

Posted on June 19, 2005 by Wheeler

So I was doing some thinking…

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What is the deal with this poker craze? Seriously why is everybody and their brother an expert in all facets of the poker game? Of course I am only kidding with the expert thing, it’s just that I get tired of seeing and hearing people try to justify why they called your all in when they only had a miracle draw. Now if you are a truly experienced player you know what I am talking about. You go to the casino and you sit at a limit table (doesn’t really matter what denomination) and you get people miscalling hands. Not miscalling say, a boat, strait, flushes, but miscalling how many outs they had or that when they called or bet they had the upper hand. It’s probably the one thing that truly boils my blood theses days.

To make matters worse with these idiots quote celebrity poker and say shit like “Ben Affleck did it so it must be right.” DAMN YOU FUCKING IDIOTS!!! Why do people even watch celebrity poker anyways? Will you game become that much better because you saw Andy Dick go all in with middle pair or even a celebrity properly plays a hand? Why not broadcast my poker night; honestly you would get a far better game to watch and you would have the fag from New Radio commenting on everything. I mean he talks about how the bartender fucks ups somebody’s Mai Tai. Really who cares if it’s missing a cherry?!

you love me so dont kid yourself

I think this poker thing will go down in flames just like the Macarena. Think about it how many fads have exploded like poker has and stayed for more then a year? Slap bracelets, parachute pants, Vanilla Ice, and Crystal Clear Pepsi lasted no longer then a year. So why is poker the exception? There are always gonna be the hardcore fans, but the mainstream jumps ship all the time. So in retrospect I know that once again my sacred game why be restored to its once god like status.

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About Wheeler

I am a multi car train wreck of half assed dreams. Sure I like the idea of success, but getting there is like super hard and stuff. I probably drink too much and I am a horrible drunk dialer. My mother still does my laundry and comes over to my house to cook me food. When I play video games on XBOX Live I tend to use awful language with young children. My football addiction has been compared to that of a heroin user. I don’t like using condoms. My apartment is super cold by choice. I love to take super hot and excessively long showers. I don’t recycle; in fact I go out of my way to litter. I hate shaving and combing my hair. I wear basketball shorts and hoodies almost all the time. I don’t like Christmas or any other holiday that doesn’t permit excessive drinking. I didn’t vote for Barak Obama. I have been arrested 12 times in 9 different municipalities, all for unpaid traffic tickets. I have been in a knife fight and lost. Golf is something I do poorly. I spell like a blind kid. I stole G.I. Joes from a blind kid when I lived in Baltimore. I am bad with money. You wouldn’t confuse me with Jerry Seinfeld because I am not Jewish or funny. I burn every bridge I can for the sake of making things harder for me when I need something from that person. Anyone that knows me for any period of time finds me disagreeable. The only things I do well are complain and consume.
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One Response to Damn foodstamp poker players

  1. Anonymous says:
    June 24, 2005 at 3:07 AM

    poker effing sucks.. i hate it.. its boreing and people play it because they cant entertain themselvs .. blahhh

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