Bree Olson Analysis

This is crazy but awesome. Via Mroglolblo on reddit (slight censorship made to some words below):

Bree Olson is interesting to me because her performance style is so obviously fake and crafted to be most mens fantasy woman but there is somehow a mutual awareness of its stylized nature that it’s still a huge turnon. It’s hard to articulate but there’s almost a question mark or hint of irony and sarcasm to everything she says that is weirdly more intimate than if she talked about what a “cock hungry whore” she is with complete conviction. It’s kind of like when your girlfriend tries to come up with ridiculous dirty talk to get you off on one level you’re both trying not to crack up but on another level you are getting unironically rock hard at her yelling to make her a “dirty c*m slut f#cktoy!”
What is interesting is that Bree had this persona down pat almost from the beginning, with a star like Lexi Belle in her first year of scenes there is an endearingly shy and naive quality to her but the only scene I have watched with Bree where she is remotely “out of character” is her scene for loadmymouth [1] this is probably the closest you will see to watching her get f#cked and not her pornstar persona.
Her bukkake scenes are great because her personality never flags. The turnon for most bukkake scenes is seeing the contrast between the chipper eager to please persona at the beginning at how she’s smiling through gritted teeth and just wants it to be over at the end. [2] with Bree if anything even though she’s a bit redeyed she’s even more into it at the end. [3] even shot a bts scene after where she walks around topless outside and sucks off the director in a stairwell and gets him to f#ck her in the ass.
If I were to teach a course for aspiring pornstars on how to become truly successful in the industry I would use Bree as a template. I’d teach the course for free too, just being able to watch a group of young women analytically watch porn and take notes and even if they’re clothed having them ride me in my chair before I roll my eyes and yell stop before explaining everything they did wrong, “you need to E-NUN-CEEE-ATE” “I AM! Your COCK-HUN-GREEE SLUT!” Watch this Sasha Grey clip and absorb the subtleties….. And I can tell how serious she is and watches it with the intensity of a chessmaster and as she rides me I gradually give encouragement “I’m your jizz bucket!” “Good! Again!” I”M YOUR JIZZ BUCKET! I’m Your slutty f#ckslave!” “Good! Brilliant improvisation!” and after faking a wonderful orgasm she slinks off me and jokingly collapses into a contended puddle and I tell her to take a bow and she does a little curtsy and handwave while still flush in the face and skips back to her chair and we share a look and she stays back to talk to me after class and while staring at the floor says “Ummm…I really felt I made a breakthrough today, but I know I can do better, I was wondering if you could ummm… give me some private lessons after class…..?”
Over the next six months I teach her everything I know and in the first week of her career she takes the industry by storm and is soon the most searched for pornstar on google and her scenes get 1300 upvotes in r/nsfw and she starts landing mainstream crossover roles and is jokingly referenced on sitcoms the way Jenna Jameson was in the 90’s and when she accepts the AVN award for Best New Starlet she tearfully accepts and says “Firstoff I would like to thank Mroglolblo! He taught me everything I know, I wouldn’t be standing here today without him!” As I whistle and cry tears of pride, and when I start the next years round of classes I see 80 women in my reception room looking to get a free spot.

I think this is the response everyone is feeling after reading that…


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