New sports franchise needed in St Louis, why not the LFL?


Surfing through the dredges of Friday prime time television with my gf last week, I came upon a gem on MTV2 known as the LFL. LFL stands for Lingerie Football League and that is just what it sounds like. So not feeling like a creeper with my gf on my shoulder watching with me, I actually (after looking at boobs and butts first) was getting into the game. These girls can actually play.

Remember the chick that did this with a nerf football?

The reason I want a new sports franchise in St Louis is for obvious reasons, see above photo, and for the fact that I don’t care for hockey or soccer. I know what you are thinking, who can I live in St Louis and not care for hockey or soccer? Lemme tell you, I grew up in Baltimore Maryland. The only sports figure that meant anything to me was Cal Ripken Jr. and the Orioles in general. Just before moving to this muddy city (St Louis) the Ravens came into Baltimore and changed my life forever. I had been baptized in the glory of football! Now overall in terms of sports franchises I would rather have a pro basketball team, but the people that live on the west side of the Missouri river would get scared and start using The Club again. So naturally a half nude football team of hot chicks fits what this city needs.

I bet she doesn't need water at the half, look at that camel toe.

This stuff would sell out by itself. I propose we get a franchise and have them play right before Rams games in the tailgating parking lot. What could be better then beer, grilled meats, hot chicks playing football, and angry wives? St Louis millionaires please consider bringing something that matters in to this city if for no other reason then for the children.

Backside Blitz!

About Wheeler

I am a multi car train wreck of half assed dreams. Sure I like the idea of success, but getting there is like super hard and stuff. I probably drink too much and I am a horrible drunk dialer. My mother still does my laundry and comes over to my house to cook me food. When I play video games on XBOX Live I tend to use awful language with young children. My football addiction has been compared to that of a heroin user. I don’t like using condoms. My apartment is super cold by choice. I love to take super hot and excessively long showers. I don’t recycle; in fact I go out of my way to litter. I hate shaving and combing my hair. I wear basketball shorts and hoodies almost all the time. I don’t like Christmas or any other holiday that doesn’t permit excessive drinking. I didn’t vote for Barak Obama. I have been arrested 12 times in 9 different municipalities, all for unpaid traffic tickets. I have been in a knife fight and lost. Golf is something I do poorly. I spell like a blind kid. I stole G.I. Joes from a blind kid when I lived in Baltimore. I am bad with money. You wouldn’t confuse me with Jerry Seinfeld because I am not Jewish or funny. I burn every bridge I can for the sake of making things harder for me when I need something from that person. Anyone that knows me for any period of time finds me disagreeable. The only things I do well are complain and consume.
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2 Responses to New sports franchise needed in St Louis, why not the LFL?

  1. Pingback: Blues are the best right now, here is proof. | Dammit Wheeler

  2. Desiree says:

    well thats for sure!!!! I have wanted one in st. louis forever get it done!

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